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2 – River Camp

Posted on September 22, 2025

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Draft 5 – Updated 22 September 2025 (C002/D005)

The day was done. The sun was down, the Devil’s Beard was stirring, and its nocturnal residents were becoming active. The high rhythmic trill of crickets drowned out the rustling of small mammals and the calls of distant owls. Large predators were yawning, stretching, and feeling the pangs of hunger.

Within the boundaries of the Cold River camp, the knockers, the wagoneers, and the camp workers, were fast asleep in their tents. The children were huddled on the ground covered by filthy blankets; the chain that held them was secured to the trunk of an everwood. 

The coffle master and three of the deputies were sitting on their bedrolls sheltered by the overlapping branches of two towering everwoods. High above them, beyond the reach of the firelight and just past the range of their hearing, sat the elf bounty hunter who had been staking them out for weeks.

The final deputy of their group was posted on guard duty, along with two of the adult slaves. LT, the elf’s black-hatted bounty was seated at the fire. His turn at watch, the elf knew, was scheduled to begin soon. 

Thanks to the little charade in front of the church earlier in the day, the stage was set for the final phase of Hunter’s plan. Their bounty was now under Autumn’s spell. With a little luck, he would doze off during his watch and that would be the end of it.  

In the unlikely event that he managed to stay awake for his entire watch, Hunter and his team of bounty hunters would move to a riskier Plan B and abduct their target the hard way. Regardless, though, this night was their last opportunity, because tomorrow night their bounty would be sleeping in a barracks at The Shadows.

Hunter’s position gave him a commanding view of the battlefield below. He could see the camp, see their horses, see his bounty, and see the slaves. He could hear the banter around the fire, the snoring from the tents, and the anxiety of the horses—who were doubtlessly sensing the hungry predators stirring in the forest beside their paddock. His strategic placement also allowed him to coordinate with his compatriots using sounds the humans either could not hear or were unable to distinguish from the background noise of the forest at night. 

Decades of experience as a bounty hunter told Hunter that their mission was likely moving forward to a successful conclusion tonight. If there was a bump in the road that could divert their plan from its path it might be the cough of the little girl that appeared to be spreading to others. 

Under normal circumstances, Hunter would be able to count on the cruelty of the slavers to ignore the child’s cough and stick to their comfortable habits. However, these were not normal circumstances. One of these slavers was not a slaver at all.

“Sounds like that cough done took,” said one of the deputies.

Overseer Wilson silently clenched his jaw. Another cough emerged from the darkness. This one was not a child’s cough.

“Damn!” Walking to the edge of the firelight, he raised his voice. “You sick, too, Moonshine?”

“Naw,” replied a voice from the darkness. “I’m good.”

Shoulda done the three silver treatment, Wilson chastised himself. “What about y’all?” he demanded of the group at the fire. One by one, they all told him that they were fine.

“I’m like the guy who jumped off the Tower of Elal,” LT said with a sly smirk.

“What about him?” asked the captain.

“As he was falling, people on each floor kept hearing him say, ‘So far, so good!’”

“And?”

“So far so good,” LT replied, eyes sparkling playfully.

“That’s a dumb goddam joke,” the captain replied with a glare. “Go relieve Porkchop.”

LT stood, adjusted his katana and headed out into the darkness. His path took him directly under Hunter. As LT passed the coffle, he checked the chain to make certain it was secure. Two of the children were coughing. The youngest girl’s cough was especially bad and it seemed to be getting worse.

Hunter took it all in from his perch. He heard the joke, watched LT adjust his gear, watched him check the slave chain, and noted an intense pulse of red as he passed the girl with the cough. “Ain’t right,” he heard LT mutter under his breath.

At precisely that moment Hunter also heard a cricket trill at a slightly lower frequency than all of the other sounds in the background. It was his daughter, Scout, letting him know she was awake and ready in her assigned spot. Hearing that, he waited for a response from Autumn verifying that he was in place as well. 100 heartbeats later…nothing.

Below him on the ground, LT relieved his comrade and carefully surveyed the darkness waiting for his eyes to adjust. When his eyes and ears convinced him that everything was as it should be, he moved stealthily to the slaves. 

Keeping one eye on the deputies gathered around the fire, LT opened his canteen, sat the little girl up, and gave her a long drink. When she finished, he wiped the canteen with his sleeve and gave the coughing boy next to her a long drink as well. Then he wiped the canteen one more time and put it back in his coat. The coughing subsided.

All of this Hunter observed with interest. Wha’choo up to, boy? he asked himself silently about this unusual behaviour. Wha’choo up to?

Why would a wanted man take a Company contract, he wondered? More importantly, why would he take a contract that took him toward The Shadows and not away from them? It was an extraordinary risk.

This wrinkle—this unexpected behavior from a fugitive—was the reason Hunter was waiting until the last possible moment to pull the trigger on an abduction that should have happened days ago. Hunter knew LT was up to something, but he did not yet know what.

That was the moment at which everything changed. 

Nothing about that moment seemed historic. Hunter was in a tree, which to be honest was where one would normally find him. The slaves were in their chains. The overseer and his deputies were reclining on their bedrolls. Everything and everyone was exactly where one would expect to find them—except….

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2 thoughts on “2 – River Camp”

  1. Craig Cargile says:
    October 3, 2025 at 1:01 pm

    Overall: Objective is clear, plan is in place; the assumption is that the elves are able to extract the sleeper stealthily, avoiding a broader confrontation where they would be outnumbered.

    Scene is imaginable; darkness descended, camp set for the night.

    Pretty short passage, not much more comes to mind.

    Detailed items:
    I’d remove the comma after workers in: “and the camp workers, were”

    Suggesting to remove the repeated ‘sees’ in: “Hunter’s position gave him a commanding view of the battlefield below. He could see the camp, see their horses, see his bounty, and see the slaves.”

    I noticed Hunter’s thought (asked himself silently) is in italics, but Wilson’s (Shoulda done the three silver treatment,) was not.

    “and noted an intense pulse of red” No idea what this is, assuming it will be explained later.

    It is a bit surprising that Hunter is not concerned about Autumn’s absence. He acts as if nothing is wrong, taking it in stride.

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  2. Brent Johner, Author says:
    October 3, 2025 at 1:40 pm

    Great feedback, again. Thank you. Corrections have been made in the core copy and will be included in the next update.

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