Draft 1 – Updated 23 OCT 2025 (C012/D001)
The arrival of the Company’s posse in the valley did not interfere with their nightly rendezvous, but it did cause Autumn and Scout to adjust the routes they took to get there. Scout opted for the woods. She followed narrow game trails that required her to walk her horse for much of the way. Autumn’s adjustment kept him away from the riverbank and the open land between Milton and the river. His new route took him onto the same network of wooded game trails that Scout was accessing, but from the opposite direction.
Given that elves leave few tracks, shed few skin cells, and emit virtually no distinguishable odors, this extra caution was probably not necessary for Autumn. But neither of them wanted to do anything that might accidentally imperil their mission and lead the searchers to the children.
The first to arrive at the rendezvous spot was Scout. It was a cup of tea after sunset when she got there, still twilight. Pulling a carrot from her vest, she snapped it in half and offered the first part to her horse who sniffed it briefly before nuzzling it from her hand. As the horse crunched on his half of the carrot, Scout stroked his cheek and quietly chewed the other half.
Autumn arrived a short while later and, due to his new route, ended up coming up behind Scout and her horse. So their meeting on this night began a healthy distance away from the old barn which is what Scout was planning to suggest anyway.
The package Scout was delivering included coal from Collier’s mine, blankets, and several items of children’s clothing. Tomorrow’s package would be more of the same as both Collier and Miller had offered clothing that had once belonged to their wives and children.
Amanda had filled the little space that remained in the last saddlebag with some soft cheese and a dozen fresh chicken eggs. These were things the proficient elf hunters caring for the children could not find in the bush. So she knew they would be appreciated as treats.
In hushed voices, Autumn and Scout exchanged information about the happenings in the town and progress in the grove. Autumn had a lot of questions about human children. Raised primarily by Hunter, Scout’s mother was human. So she had a better understanding of humanity than Autumn, whose own experience was limited to a few years in Elora’s grove and the past two years traveling with Hunter’s team.
“The noise,” Autumn admitted. “That’s the hardest part.”
Scout’s eyes twinkled with amusement. She suppressed a grin.
“They can’t speak without shouting,” he said, his shoulders dropping dramatically. “And they have to talk about everything. Endlessly.”
Scout giggled. “Now you understand why Hunter compares them to coyotes.”
Autumn rolled his eyes. “Coyotes that grow into gnolls,” he recalled, wondering for a moment what the hell he was doing. “Can I ask you something? Are we just wasting our time?” he asked.
Scout considered the question, tipping her head to the side. “Hunter thinks it’s the Company.”
Autumn’s face winced. “Is it though?” he asked, taking possession of a heavy saddle bag and carrying it up into an everwood.
“My mother was good,” Scout replied thoughtfully. “There are good humans in Old Mill. Good humans everywhere in the valley, to be honest. Even some of the deputies are good. You know that. It’s the system. Twists them up. Turns them into gnolls.”
Autumn sighed. “I suppose,” he replied, lifting a blanket from the saddlebag and placing it inside a hollow recess. “We have our monsters, too.”
“How are your energy levels?” Scout was concerned. Elves didn’t sleep, but they needed to spend time in everwood hollows to replenish their energy levels. The more energy they were expending, the more rest they needed. Autumn was bleeding sap like a spring maple right now.
“I’m managing,” he said. “A few more days and I should be able to replenish. Last night was rough because I had to visit so many farms.”
“You have to be careful,” Scout warned him. “You are alone. You have no backup right now. If something happens and your sap is low…”
“Another couple of days,” Autumn said as he removed items from a bag, loaded them into a hollow, and rolled the bark back over the entrance, “we’ll be ready for bad weather. I should be able to replenish in the afternoons.”
The nights were key to their plan’s success. Autumn could operate easily in the dark and was least likely to be seen. Provided nobody knew they were there, the children were safe behind a wall of thorns. But the arrival of the posse meant that their ability to move supplies might soon be restricted. It also meant more probing eyes in general and concerted effort to find the children.
“You heard the hounds today?” Scout asked.
“I did.” Autumn greeted the subject with grave concern.
“What are you thinking?”
“I’m thinking…that could become a problem.”
“Me, too,” Scout agreed, reaching up to receive the empty saddle bag being handed down.
“I just haven’t figured out how to deal with it yet,” Autumn complained while descending to the ground.
Scout smiled and her eyes twinkled.
“What?” Autumn’s brows knit together and he smiled back, excited by Scout’s mischievous look.
“Open the bag,” she grinned, lifting her eyebrows and glancing at the bag on the ground between them.
Autumn squatted, grinning with anticipation. He unbuckled the flap and lifted it, peeking inside. His eyes widened and lips spread into a toothy smile.
“Eggs,” he squealed. “And”—his eyes grew wide—”goat cheese! Oh, Scout,” he sprang up, stepped over the bag, opened his arms, grabbed her shoulders and embraced her—pressing his cheek to hers. “You’re brilliant.”
Scout beamed, hugging him back.
“How did you know?”
“I didn’t,” Scout admitted, grinning. “Amanda put them in the bag this morning. That’s what gave me the idea.”
A short while later, Scout took her horse and left Autumn alone in the moonlight. He would make several trips back and forth across the everwood before dawn in order to ferry the newest supplies to the grove. But before that could begin, he needed to do something else. So while Scout returned to Old Mill, Autumn went to Milton.
Figuring this was as good a place as any, he sat cross-legged on the ground at the intersection of two dirt trails on the west side of the village. For a long while, all he did was listen. The buildings, which humans described as abandoned, teamed with nocturnal activities. Far from empty, every nook and cranny was occupied. Rats. Mice. Skunks. Racoons. Owls and bats. Insects and arachnids. Humans said the village was abandoned because no humans lived there. An elf would never say this because elves are nothing like gnolls.
When he was done listening, Autumn had a strong sense of who was present and how many would be willing to hear his proposal. He started with a growl. It was not a big growl, like he might use to call a bear or a mountain lion. It was a small growl, punctuated by little grunts the size of a newborn piglet. But softer. Gentler. Then he added some hisses, some scratching, and a few other sounds that humans would not notice but every creature of the forest would immediately recognize as a call to surfeit.
One by one, they answered. Some waddled, stopping now and then to stand up on hind legs and sniff the air. Others galloped in clumsily from afar. One particularly athletic individual loped through tall grass in an effort to jump over potential entanglements. Most, however, followed the trails purposefully, using their tiny black ears to guide them to where their beady black eyes could not. The smell of their species came with them. And as the number of skunks surrounding him grew to nearly a dozen, Autumn grew confident this plan would work.
He thanked them first for coming, presenting each with a piece of goat cheese and farm fresh chicken egg. The skunks, duly impressed by the creature’s largess, wondered what he wanted from them that would require such exotic gifts.
“I imagine all of you can smell the human children who recently spent a night in the big building,” Autumn began.
“Of course we can,” replied the skunks, “for we are skunks and we can smell everything.”
“Wonderful,” Autumn exclaimed, clapping his hands with delight.
When the surfeit ended a short while later, Autumn returned to the everwood hollow and began moving supplies over the river while the skunks got to business licking up skin flakes and making the children’s scent trail uninviting to anyone who might seek to follow it.
The objective is to mask the children’s scent and throw the slavers off their trail.
Animals are called upon to help cover their tracks and scent trails. Given eggs and cheese as an incentive to help.
Autum learns more about Scout, and we gain insight into her genetic makeup. She is part human.
Autumn makes observations about the children, and as a teacher of younger children, I wholeheartedly agree with his thoughts!!
Outcome: Tension still rising, although this chapter is a little more relaxed with some humour. The relationship between Scout and Autumn seems to be developing… growing into something else, maybe?
The gnolls confuse me slightly. I don’t know if I am reading this correctly, but are gnolls created from human or elf beings? I may have misunderstood what was being written.
Hi Becca.
Hunter and Scout are both comparing humans to coyotes and gnolls. They begin life as noisy as coyotes. When they grow up to as dangerous as gnolls. This comparison will grow more meaningful as the story progresses.
Summary:Scout and Autumn have a new topic for their nightly meeting but have a new topic; The Company has sent a search party. We concerned? If so, what can we do? Enlist the skunks!
I enjoyed the interaction with the skunks.
One thing is bothering me. I know that this isn’t a character driven story, but who is your protagonist? I thought, initially that it was Hunter, yet he has disappeared for multiple chapters. I asked you about Scout earlier, and your response made it clear that she isn’t meant to be a primary focal point. As a reader, I am wondering about how the situation is impacting them. And I need to be able to relate to them as well, of course. I struggle with this as well. I am getting the breadcrumbs that create a bit more interest in Autumn than simply the fact that s/he has concerns about the children and wants to help them, such as the impact to healers/druids and to elvenkind in general. Is that who is being worked to the front as the main focal point?
AUTHOR: There were eight major storylines in Game of Thrones. The protagonist was the Stark family, not a individual. There were seven major storylines in Lonesome Dove. The protagonist was the Hat Creek Cattle Company, not on individual. In Pillars of the Earth, the protagonist was the Kingsbridge Priori, not an individual. In Book 1 of the Stormlight Archives, there were seven major characters and even more storylines.
AUTHOR: In The Last Coffle the protagonist is the community that unites to fight back against the Company. Autumn is the star in the first third of the book. Amanda is the star in the middle third. Nastya is the star in the final third. Hunter is the unifying force moving in the background of all three stories.
Notes:
Scout was accessing, but from the opposite direction.
ended up coming up behind Scout and her horse.
Autumn followed the trails from the opposite direction yet ended up behind Scout?
AUTHOR: I suspect you are imagining a single, linear trail rather than a tangled network of trails.
So she knew they would be appreciated as treats. Just an FYI, I initially got confused between Amanda and Scout here, and wondered why Scout would think this.
AUTHOR: Resolved. Thank you.
Raised primarily by Hunter, Scout’s mother was human. So she had a better understanding of humanity than Autumn, whose own experience was limited to a few years in Elora’s grove and the past two years traveling reads a bit awkward to me.
AUTHOR: the awkwardness is deliberate. The sentence contains a clue. I want readers to have to read the sentence twice. I do this frequently. It’s part of my style.
wondering for a moment what the hell he was doing. your subsequent dialog covers this Can I ask you something? Are we just wasting our time?
AUTHOR: Noted. Thank you.
possession of a heavy saddle bag and carrying it up climbing? into an everwood.
“How are your energy levels?”Autumn was bleeding sap like a spring maple right now.“You are alone. You have no backup right now. If something happens and your sap…”
You first used energy levels in dialog above and sap outside as part of a metaphor, then used sap in dialog.
AUTHOR: Correct…thereby defining a concept for the reader via context instead of using exposition or dialogue. The paragraph defines things in a way that readers already understands. But the final sentence is transitions from energy to sap. This should link the two ideas in the reader’s mind for future context.
AUTHOR: Resolved. Thank you.
The nights were key to their plan’s success. Autumn could operate easily in the dark and was least likely to be seen. Provided nobody knew they were there, the children were safe behind a wall of thorns. But the arrival of the posse meant that their ability to move supplies might soon be restricted. It also meant more probing eyes in general and concerted effort to find the children. Maybe turn this into dialog between them?
AUTHOR: Autumn is struggling with adult worries for the first time in his life. The fact that he attempts to carry these burdens by himself at the start of the story leads to an important failure which causes him to change. Learning to share this burden with other adults (not the children) is essential to his arc.
Thank you Craig. I appreciate your feedback. Changes have been made to the master file and will be incorporated with the next update.
I have also added inline responses to some of your comments.
Thank you Abhijit. I appreciate your feedback. Changes have been made to the master file and will be incorporated with the next update.
I have also added inline responses to some of your comments.